In this week’s Torah portion, Be’halot’cha, the Torah writes:
“Those traveling with the Jewish people (in the desert) had a desire, and the Jewish people also cried out and said, Who will feed us meat?  We remember the fish we ate in Egypt for free and now our souls are dry because all we have is this manna.  God became angry and this was also bad in Moses’ eyes.  And Moses said to God why have you done evil to your servant (me) to put the burden of this whole people upon me.  Did I give birth to this nation, that you say to me carry them in your bosom like the one who is nursing carries her child?  I am not able to carry them alone, if this is how it will be, please kill me now (Numbers chap. 11).”

Moses’ response stands in stark contrast to other times in the Torah when the Jewish people complained or were rebellious.   When God wanted to destroy the Jewish people after their sin of the Golden Calf, Moses said “If so remove me from your book.”   When they complained about water he brought them water from the rock.   Why in these instances was Moses so tolerant of the Jewish people and so willing to sacrifice for them?

I think that an identical act of sin or rebellion, such as complaining against God, is not always the same.   The motivation, the background and the psychological state of the perpetrator is not something small or besides the point, it is everything.   The Jewish People first cry for water after they cross the Red Sea, they are only a few days out of slavery, have followed a man and a God they do not know into the barren desert, and so the correct response to their complaint is tolerance and empathy.  The people’s worship of the Golden Calf is on the surface a horrific sin, but when we look closer at their motivation and their emotional state, we see they feel abandoned, lost and think their only guide in the desert, Moses, is not coming back.  They are scared and despondent.  

In our parsha, though the Jewish people are in a different state.  They are secure, on their way to the land of Israel, have finished receiving the Torah and erecting the Tabernacle.  They have a spiritual connection, a promised land toward which they are on a few week journey – they are in a good place.   Their desire now is, as the Torah puts it, a desire for desire.   Complaining to complain.   Things may not be perfect, but the Jewish people at this moment fail to see their blessings and be thankful for what they have.   This leads them to just complain for its own sake.   Ingratitude, callousness, an inability to say thank you for, and appreciate what they have at this point in their history -this Moses can not tolerate.   

The lesson is important.  Before we judge others let’s be sure to ask ourselves where they are at and what fear, loneliness or anxiety might have prompted them to do something we do not like.  Let us not first blame them, but rather ask how we can help.  At the same time let us judge ourselves and ask, “How can I be more grateful for what I have, how can I recognize the kindness which others, God and those who have come before me, have done for me.